Terry Foster: 10 Rules For Parents At Games

By Terry Foster
@TerryFoster971

I joke with parents that I would love to write a book about my experiences as a soccer parent but nobody would talk to me afterwards.

There would be too much baggage and embarrassment.

That brings us to the saga of the grown ass man who attacked a 16 year old soccer referee between the Waza Football Club and Canton Celtics. I am familiar with both clubs. My daughter Celine wanted to play for the Celtics because of the tough games she enjoyed with them but Canton is outside our jurisdiction. And Celine played for Waza a few years ago.

We are also familiar with bad parent behavior from the clubs we play on and the ones we play against. It did not surprise me that the incident by the Waza parent came during a U-11 game. Usually bad behavior happens at an earlier age when people still view these games as life and death. Parents mature and embarrassing behavior tends to subside in soccer.

I am not sure about other sports where people tell me parents get out of control more in hockey, baseball and dance competitions believe it or not.

I've never screamed at an official in my life. I know they are not perfect and that person did not wake up that morning with the sole purpose to get at my child.

In fact I rarely say anything during games. It is best that way. I carry the no cheering in the press box mentality during my son Brandon's and daughter Celine's games.

There is a way to behave during games. Here are my top 10 rules for parents at games.

1. It is OK to cheer your child and encourage them. It is not OK to talk about another kid from another club. For instance you cannot say "You can take her Sarah. She is not that good."

2. It is OK to say "come on ref, call it both ways." That is part of the American way. However, it is not OK to ride the referee on every call. Not every call goes against your team.

3. It is OK to talk to the coach about why Little Johnnie, the next Miguel Cabrera, does not get enough playing time. It is not OK to scream at the coach during games or chase him off the field.

4. It is OK to scream encouragement and clap for your players and your team. It is not OK to use cowbells and horns when your team scores or makes a good play. Yes, I have seen it.

5. It is OK to on occasion to tell your kid what to do. It is not OK to constantly ride them the entire game. They are not only on the field or court to play. They are also there to think for themselves.

6. It is OK to walk the sidelines so you can get a better look at the play. It is not OK to step on the field because you are angry. I've seen parents during baseball games walk on the diamond and refuse to leave until threatened with forfeit.

7. It is OK to say good morning to parents on the opposite team. It is not OK to argue with them about what is happening on the field.

8. On road trips and team dinners it is OK to have a beer or two. It is not OK to get drunk in front of your children and begin talking loudly. You are the only one who thinks you are entertaining and funny.

9. It is OK to make a lot of noise when your team goes up 2-1 late in a game. It is not OK to scream and do backflips when your team makes it 11-0.

10. It is OK to softly tell your kid the good and bad they did on the field as you are driving home. It is not OK to storm off the field and let the entire world you know were not happy with their performance.

Just remember these games are supposed to be fun for parents, coaches and players. This is not life or death.

And does anybody notice how the kids get over the loss much quicker than the parents?

(Foster can be reached at Terry.Foster@cbsradio.com)