Police in Chatham, Ontario are releasing details of some of their calls for help — in hopes that you won’t repeat any of them. They’re hoping to show what does — and does not — amount to a police emergency.

Calls deemed not an emergency include:

A man who allegedly stole slippers from a neighbor — and wore them to cut grass.

A dispute over the price of a pizza.

A dispute over the last slice of pizza.

A hunter who thought a spike in car-deer collisions was the reason he couldn’t find any.

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