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Eric Thomas: February Sucks

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(Photo by Stuart Franklin/Getty Images)

(Photo by Stuart Franklin/Getty Images)

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Eric Thomas spent most of his career in Flint working as a rock r...
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By: Eric Thomas

For average sports fans in Detroit, February is a long month. In years past, fans have been able to take solace in the Red Wings, but even they’ve left us wanting this year. The only fun part of hockey season this year is taking bets on how long it takes “diehard Red Wings fans” to notice the team missed the playoffs.

For sports media, it’s been rough all month. Michigan basketball, after looking like superstars while they played community colleges in much of the fall, now looks like they were woefully overrated. Michigan State has made a run as of late, but that happens every year. MSU basketball has grown beyond basing their success during the season, so we’re waiting for March.

For many of us it’s been a lot like the proverbial emaciated man dragging himself on all fours through the desert. We’ve been searching for something, anything, to distract us from the horror show going on outside our window. What happened to that mild winter from December and part of January? It seems we haven’t seen the sun in WEEKS.

Thank God for the Tigers. People don’t usually care about spring training because it sucks and it’s boring, but this year it looks like the high quality H2O we were begging for. Please oh please just show an at bat. I imagine Tiger fans could even stomach one with Brennan Boesch. Even if Papa Grande wants to pitch I would watch it, just for something that reminds me of sunny days. Days that don’t seem so bleak with iced over windshields and dry skin are almost like a myth spun from old wives tales.

The calendar says we’ve past the middle of February and March will be here soon. Detroiters hang their hats on the months that start with “M” because they represent the finish line. Michigan is awesome in the summer because it’s still light at 10pm and the humidity never approaches anywhere near the other parts of the country. It’s these two months where things unravel and become completely uninhabitable, where we all swear we’re going to move and learn our lesson like an awful hangover.

There’s even a condition that describes this malaise, “Seasonal Affective Disorder” which apparently happens when people suffer a shortage of Vitamin D, the light the sun gives off. It makes them depressed, angry and apparently hungry for all things cake. Maybe next year we should all get Vitamin D shots. Maybe the Red Wings could have a good off-season and save us the injections.

So one more solid week of this. There’s even more snow in the forecast to make things even more awful. We get some Tigers games today, thank God. It might not be the spring but at least it will sound a bit like spring. For many of us, it’s all we have right now.

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